“A Transitional Phase”: Bisexual Erasure in Contemporary Britain
Emily West / Sept 23 / Identity
To mark the celebration of Bi Visibility Day (Sept 23rd), THP posted an interview with Elly White, where we spoke about bisexual stereotypes, where they come from and why they are maintained in our society, as well as the impact that biphobia has on mental health. Many may question why a day raising awareness specifically for the bisexual community is necessary, as perhaps it further polarises bisexual people from the LGBTQ+ community. THP spoke to Elly White about this risk:
‘The whole point of the LGBTQ+ community is unity and everybody looking out for one another. You don't want to kind of splinter off into just the L, just the G, just the B, just the T or just the Q. But it is also important for there to be bisexual spaces, like online forums, just for there to be a place for someone to reach out. Social media is really helpful for that. I think it's very easy to find somebody who is being outspoken about what you are also going through and find somebody that you can relate to.’
It became clear from our interview that recognising and celebrating bisexual culture does not serve to divide bisexual people from the rest of the LGBTQ+ community, but it allows people to form support networks with those who identify in the same way. Talking about biphobia is important, as it is often ignored by mainstream media, but this does not undermine the struggles that other sexual minorities face either:
‘It’s something that needs to be discussed more. It's something that from a young age you should be aware of without the stereotypes. It needs to be part of a discussion on sexuality. Like all sexualities, and all gender identities do need to be!’
Education is clearly a very important factor in minimising all types of prejudiced thinking, but as our discussion unfolded, it became even more apparent that not enough education is given to children growing up surrounding bisexuality:
“I know that growing up, my parents were quite progressive and quite keen for me and my brother to know that two men could end up together or two women could end up together. So that was quite good for me learning to accept myself, but then there was no real discussion of bisexuality. So I was thinking… Well, what if I'm in the middle?’
The lack of education on bisexuality stems from its inherent sexualisation in society. We discussed many examples of this, ranging from the stereotype that all bisexual people are promiscuous – although this is not inherently bad; slut shaming is also rife in our society and should not be tolerated – but also the stereotypes that bisexual people are more likely to be unfaithful or just experimenting sexually. However, an appropriate discussion of bisexuality should be approached early on in life; it does not necessarily have to come from a sexual angle. As Elly said, quite profoundly, ‘children understand love’.
Fetishization of bisexuality can in many cases cause feelings of shame. Only 19% of bisexual people are open to everyone in their lives about their sexual orientation. Bisexuality is often viewed through the lens of a straight male, which is extremely problematic, and only exacerbates the way in which bisexual women in particular, feel ignored in society:
‘A lot of men find bisexuality to be attractive because they find the idea of two women having sex to be attractive – it’s the idea that they can have threesomes and stuff like that. But that’s not what a lot of bisexual women want in their lives. They just assume that because that's what the men who are in relationships with bisexual women want.’
We also explored the way in which society assumes attraction towards men overrides any other sexual orientation. So, with many people believing that bisexuality is just a phase, bisexual men are more likely to be considered gay, and bisexual women are more likely to be considered straight:
‘So if you're a woman and you're bi, it's more often, not always, but more often assumed that it's just a phase. And if you end up with a man, you're no longer bisexual – you are just straight again, that whole part of your existence gets erased. Whereas if you're a man and you're bisexual, it's like, oh, you're just gay. There's absolutely no way that you can be attracted to women or to non-binary people as well. You are attracted to men. It’s the idea that attraction to men then overrides everything else, which I find really interesting’
Overall, more definitely needs to be done to raise awareness of bisexuality, and to dispel harmful stereotypes. Whilst Bi Visibility Day is an important event to draw attention to bisexual culture and appreciate bisexual people as valid and contributing members of the LGBTQ+ community, it is not just one day of the year where we should be reflecting upon these things. The change needs to come on a societal level, through both education and media representation, to allow bisexual people to express themselves without negative judgement.
To read more of the interview, visit @the.human.perspective on Instagram.