Teach Boys Consent in the Classroom
Demi Anthony / March 16 / Violence against women
Recently, an Instagram account, ‘Everyone’s Invited’, attempted to expose the often ignored and detrimental issue of rape culture among adolescents. Through doing so, it has sparked conversation throughout multiple secondary schools and universities in the UK. Students have been encouraged to submit their own testimonies of personal experiences with rape culture. And this is where it starts: at childhood. From a young age, girls are warned to take precautions when alone in the streets, avoid dressing too provocatively and stay vigilant, constantly wary of our surroundings. But what we drill into girls, we do not so much as mention to boys. This is why education on consent and the importance of empathy needs to be focused on more and from an earlier age, particularly for young boys.
With the transition from childhood to adolescence, we are introduced to new experiences - both good and bad. However, these experiences are often tainted by the pervasive rape culture in which sexual harassment and assault are prevalent and normalised in the media and popular culture. From a young age, we are exposed to harmful cultural norms and institutions that defend rapists, absolve perpetrators of all responsibility and shame survivors. From the election of Donald Trump as president of the United States in 2016 – despite over 25 sexual misconduct allegations against him, to the incessant street harassment which is portrayed as flattering rather than offensive; our society allows sexual violence to become a normality, rather than an intolerable crime that needs addressing.
Girls are told that our bodies are distracting to our male classmates and even, disturbingly, to male teachers. As a consequence, we shift the narrative to victims and survivors, taking away from the criminal behaviour of rapists and the fact that as a society, we frequently enable this behaviour. The Guardian recently reported that 97% of young women in the UK have been sexually harassed. Thousands of anonymous testimonies have flooded Instagram anxiously recounting stories of harassment, assault, coercion and rape. And yet, This raises the question: why does everyone know someone who has been assaulted, yet no one knows a perpetrator?
Protests in Parliament Square, March 14th.
Traditional gender roles, as well as common myths surrounding rape, such as the belief that the typical rapist is a “stranger hiding in the bushes,” may make it harder for adolescent girls to recognise that sexually violent behaviours committed by friends and acquaintances are criminal.
In fact, as teenage girls, we are more likely to be victimised by our peers than by a stranger-only 10.1% of documented cases of sexual violence against women are committed by someone unknown to the victim. Although we are taught the basic concept of consent early into adolescence, our education often fails to capture the nuances of consent in situations involving coercion or intoxication. Intoxication may decrease awareness of others' actions and advances, making it harder to stop sexual advances that have gone too far.
Furthermore, belief in the myth that alcohol increases sexual arousal may also serve to legitimise and excuse sexually aggressive and coercive behaviours that would otherwise be deemed unacceptable. Outdated stereotypes that dichotomise women into categories of "good" and "bad" women may lead perpetrators to view girls who drink as sexually available and more appropriate targets than their non-drinking counterparts. A paradigm shift in the way children are taught about consent is paramount in protecting the large number of teenage girls who are affected by sexual assaults. In a society so deeply rooted in patriarchy, we are taught the predetermined roles which we are expected to fulfil within a societal hierarchy of power that perpetuates the routine violation of female autonomy.
Rather than focusing education on preventative steps women can take to avoid rape, we should aim to tackle gender norms that validate men as sexual pursuers and women as their conquests. These norms dehumanise girls, reducing them to bodies to be used as a means to an end without ever establishing mutual consent. Male objection to rape culture on account of its effects on sisters or daughters is reductive as it characterises women as adjuncts to their male counterparts, whose worth is defined by their relationship to a man. The preservation of antiquated gender ideals that demand weak and submissive women and powerful men normalise imbalances in power and control within sexual situations in adolescents.
This disproportion in power allows boys to ignore women’s' freedom of choice and self-governance in deference to their own satisfaction. Internalised societal beliefs about male sexual entitlement may contribute to teenage girls succumbing to sexual coercion or unwanted sexual situations. We have to move away from patriarchal and patrilineal descriptions of women and instead see women ‘in their own right’, redirecting focus on their individual, personal autonomy. Above all, we need to educate young boys and create an environment in which consent is expected of them, in which consent is the absolute standard and begin to hold teenage perpetrators accountable for their actions rather than victim-blaming and holding young girls to unattainable standards of caution and fear.